"Mirror Of Ink"

I look into this mirror of ink and see a soul that has no beauty in itself, but is silvery-white in the light of

Your Grace that covers me and makes me new.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

More to come starting Monday...

Hey guys! If you have been following my blog, THANK YOU! I really appreciate all the positive feedback. It has been awesome to be able to share my heart and bless people at the same time. It means a lot to me to have you as a reader, and a friend!

I just wanted to let you know that I took a break from blogging this week. (Obviously, huh!?) We have had a lot going on and I didn't want to take away from minimal family time to blog. So I will be starting back up Monday with "Kindness". I actually have already been praying about kindness this week and letting the Holy Spirit work it in me and through me, but I will still do a full week starting Monday.

So in case you were wondering where my blogs were, I just wanted you to know they are coming! And thanks again for reading!

:) Heather

Friday, March 5, 2010

Day 25- Wait with the Word

Ok so I'm just going to be honest...I haven't been blogging this week because I haven't felt like I've done too great with the patience thing thus far. I have been praying for it. Believe me, I've been praying! And I've sensed the Holy Spirit with me. But it's been hard.

You see, this just happens to be the week where we've really started moving forward with adoption. I've been researching, praying, asking others, researching, praying, e-mailing, and praying some more and we finally felt like we had found the right agency, the right country, and the right timing. But since the process began it has been nothing but waiting. Waiting to hear back about this. Waiting to get an e-mail. Waiting to find something out. Waiting to get a phone call. Waiting, waiting, and more waiting.

It has been in these times of waiting that my impatience starts to rise. I don't want to wait. I want to know what's going to happen and how it's going to happen right now. I want to see the future, know the future and control the future. Okay, not really, but that is how we feel sometimes! It is hard waiting for the unknown. It tests our patience.

What I have discovered this week, though, is that my impatience is a reflection on how much I trust God. If I trust God's perfect timing and His perfect plan, then there is really no room for impatience because I understand that He is in control and working all things together for my good. When I get impatient and try to make things happen on my own, it is like I'm saying "Okay, God, your plan isn't quite working for me, so I'm gonna get things rolling myself since you can't seem to handle the job." Absurd, isn't it? But that's just what we do! Instead of trusting God and waiting for His timing, we take things into our own hands, and end up making a mess of things.

I know God has a plan for our adoption journey. I know He has seen the end from the beginning. And I most definitely want His will for this. Not mine. I want Him to choose the child that will be forever a part of our family, and our hearts. And if I try to make things happen myself rather than patiently wait on Him, I could miss out on what He truly wants for us.

Psalm 130 verse 5 says, "I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His Word I put my hope." I think the second half of that verse is the key to being patient and waiting on the Lord. Putting our hope in His Word. If we can get it in our minds that His Word is true, never changing, and steadfast, why should we worry? Why be impatient? He promises us that He is in control, that He loves us, and that He is working things together for our good. We have to find our hope, our rest, our patience in His Word.

So that's what I'm choosing to do. I am choosing to wait. And while I wait, I am focusing on what I know to be true. God's Word. His wonderful, hope-filled Word.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Day 22- Patience Doesn't Come Easy

I don't like being patient. I don't like having to wait for what I want or think I need now. I don't enjoy the process of waiting. And, when I'm not living led by the Spirit, I usually don't wait.

I believe this is true for most of us (at least I hope it's not just me). We are an impatient people. We want what we want when we want it, which is usually now. And because of that, we often cause ourselves pain and stress trying to make something happen that is not meant to happen at the moment, or fretting over what should be happening. Why is it so hard to just wait???

We are born into the sinful nature. The sinful nature says "Me, me, me!" When we become Christians, we realize that life is not all about us, and that we are a part of a master plan created by God. But still, our flesh cries out, "What about me? What about what I want?" And so, when it is in God's plan for us to wait, our sinful nature stomps its little feet and throws a tantrum. We know we should be patient. But it's hard!

As I think about it, older people are much more patient than the younger generation. They have had to wait for things their whole lives. And perhaps they've realized that the good things God brings into your life are worth waiting for, and the things you don't get aren't worth having anyway. The Word tells us that our Heavenly Father wants to give "good gifts" to His children. But how many of us would give our children all their birthday presents the week before their birthday? The child may not understand why they can't have it all then, but we know that there's a greater purpose and a wonderful celebration ahead if they'll just wait.

The same is true for us. In times when we don't understand why we must wait on something, our Heavenly Father has our "gifts" already wrapped and ready for us, but He knows that there is a time and purpose for everything, and if we'll wait on Him, He will celebrate those gifts with us! What a good God we have to keep our best interest at heart in all He does for us.

Derick and I are in the early processes of adopting a child. It is a long and tedious process. We've just started, and I'm already having trouble being patient. But I am praying, "Lord, help me to trust your timing." If I can realize that God's plan for my life will come together piece by piece in His own perfect time, perhaps one day I will be able to silence this little tantrum-throwing sinful nature in my head as I wait on Him. I am trusting and believing God for His perfect time and the patience to wait for it!

"Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice; blessed are all who wait for him!" Isaiah 30:18